After having walked through one of the old buildings, I had to sit down again. I quickly decided to not judge myself or push myself in this - maybe this was all I could do and then that would be enough. When I sat down I put my bare feet on the ground and tried to come back to the present, since I still felt like half of me was sort of re-experiencing a life I had lived centuries ago. I can't explain what this felt like, it was the weirdest (and at the same time most amazing!) thing. How many people get to explore the layers of life in such a deep way? It was so funny seeing the people around me chatting and reading the signs, wearing their modern clothes (which I was wearing too, of course), while I felt like I was only there with one foot. Where my other foot was? Well, I would say I was revisiting a life I had before. I was receiving glimpses of the times I'd spend here - being a High priestess in Avalon.
This didn't come out of the blue for me. I had done some deep diving within myself around this theme already, since Cornwall came into my life, I kept pulling the High priestess card, and everytime I read about Avalon I felt as if something awakened in me, as if I recognized part of myself in these old stories. Which I did, of course. Sitting there it all came back to me. First of all, my body started to do things, again. My legs felt shaky already, but now also my womb started to pulse. It just.. didn't stop. I felt my whole feminine body releasing - finally reunited with the place that I once called home. Finally being in the energies of the High priestesses again - reclaiming the woman that got suppressed and judged by who she was for lifetimes. It doesn't matter in what form she appeared in later or earlier lives: she was the witch, the priestess, the shaman, the wise one, the seeres - and I had to supress her for many lives in order to protect her from many, many things. Until now, and she felt it. My soul felt it, my body felt it, my womb felt it. I was remembering who I was, and still am.
I started to receive clear words about who I am and what it is that I'm here to do in this life. I felt my dignity, and with that I felt so much respect for the gifts that I have, the ones I had suppressed for so long. And in the meantime, my womb just kept.. pulsing. Contracting and releasing, all the time. I could feel her releasing all the pain around having to hold the real me in, all the pain she'd stored around lifetimes of being persecuted. All the women I had tried to be in order to fit in this modern linear world just faded away, until only 'I' remained. And holy moly, it was quite something to meet myself there.
As I kept walking little distances, allowing myself to sit down all the time, I could feel the last bits release: all judgements I had held about my body and myself, they just left me. My body started to feel extremely heavy - I feel like I've been taking a few steps and sitting down over and over again, for hours on end. At some point I got to King Arthurs tombe. There wasn't too much to see, but I felt like (this might sound crazy) I could feel that he was very happy for the priestesses to have returned to help restore the feminine in a world that so badly needs that. What I channeled at that tombe was that I came back to bring the priestess energy into today's world. To restore the feminine. And that many of us reïncarnated now, to do the same. I could see how a true woman stands for herself, she doesn't allow anything or anyone outside herself to make her feel small. She doesn't allow anything or anyone to make her doubt her power, her wisdom, her inner eye, her inner knowing. The ages of persecution had to end here, and I had returned to help. And I'm not alone - apparently there's a whole army of Avalons priestesses out there, doing the work.
Returning to these gardens was definitely one of the most special and amazing experiences of my life. Spending time in Glastonbury, unplanned and with a camper that was in need of help, turned out to be a true blessing. I guess life is always trying to teach us something or help us in a way - very often we just can't see it. But when we manage to turn something that seems 'bad' into an opportunity (I'm praciticing that every day now), life is full of surprises. After this experience I pretty much just slept till the next morning - which brought me to the Glastonbury Tor. But that's for the next blog!
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